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I don't really need to explain given the title, but as stupid as it is losing that meant sometime to me in my adolescence, & now it's gone & I feel like I lost a lot more than just that. In just 30 mins all that frustration and inadequacy ended in a explosive catharsis but after theres just nothing.
I'm on top of a euphoric summit and everything just seems so distant now I know that I've reached my peak, but there's nothing else to achieve, nothing to be proud of, & now I look back at all the time I wasted trying to achieve this euphoria and all the money I spent & all the time I jerked off thinking it was for nothing, I wasted it all, & time like that never comes back.
at the very least I still have the rest of my life to figure out what is worth worrying about, like what's really waterproof or something.